Great Uncle McCoy Carnes & Great Aunt Edna Messer Remembered

My parents taught me the value of family and respect for my heritage. It was after all their motivating factor to relocate from Michigan to Kentucky. They had a dream that their children would grow up, knowing their family members and appreciating the history from which our family derived.
Knowing my great-grandparents has always been a cherished gift I received from living in Kentucky. My mother’s father, Alonzo Carnes, provided me the connection of my Great Grandfather George Martin Carnes, Sr. , Pap was a character to say the least. Always living on the curve, raising his family from off the land he farmed, sure, life wasn’t easy, but my Great Aunts and Uncles did very well for themselves from this heritage and today their families have become individuals who have made great impacts throughout our communities. I enjoy the pleasure of being a Pap, named after him, to a little guy named Seth Joshua and a precious little baby girl, Julia Anna Baker. I don’t always wear the biv-overalls like Pap did, and I don’t roll my own cigarettes from Prince Albert in the can, but I pray to leave them the value of family, a heritage rich in tradition, and genuine love to be carried on to the next generation.
This side of my family has always been special because of the absence of my grandfather in my life. My great-aunts and uncles filled his shoes in such a way that I was actually a teenager before I realized his absence. Their love and the investment of their time into my life will forever remain a part of the very being that I am.
Recently our family experienced the loss of my Great Uncle McCoy “Sam” Carnes and my Great Aunt Edna Messer. The family life line continues in my Aunt Evelyn Warren and my two remaining Uncles, George Carnes Jr., and Cloyd Carnes. These elderly giants of life and history helped fill my missing answers about life, of which I will always be grateful for their willingness to invest in me and my understanding.
When I learned of their individual passings, immediately the first thoughts that came to my mind were the last two conversations I had with each of them. Conversations about family and what they perceived and believed with respect to life as it was, and is today. I wanted no speculation about their thoughts, I needed to hear from them and they each shared with me. Actually I had the same conversation with each of my great aunts and uncles and I was so overwhelmed by their candor and what I perceived to be heart felt genuine thoughts. It is never easy to approach family to talk about history and to understand why folks did what they did, but I am so grateful that they knew my heart and respected my life enough to share from their unique position of a brother and a sister regarding my grandfather, my mother, and Aunt Imogene. I have always had the highest regards for them because they remained connected even when others disappeared. My desire for conversation about life and how I should live my life was filled with their stories about times they were done wrong by others, childhood experiences with Big Mom and Pap, stories of how they decided to raise their families and how you just got to let some people do what they are going to do. Valuable information that they shared with me, knowledge I learned from them and wisdom that I’ve shared already with others in my life.
Meeting Uncle McCoy at the store and sitting there, just a rocks through from the old home place, was most precious. Drinking a soda on him and listening to him share with me about my mother made me see clearly why she always loved him so. Driving to Aunt Edna’s which always seemed so far away, was just a short ride to the porch that look way down from the road as a child. Hearing her talk about mistakes witnessed in life, and about the difficulties each has been through in their lives was a reminded that we are all human, we’ve all made decisions we wish we could take back, but yet, we find ourselves living life the best we know or can, under the circumstances that surround us.
My life is no secret. I believe the road to the future is paved by those who have gone before us. We have options to take or choices to follow, or we can attempt to make a new road using the wisdom of the past for our own decisions and life’s journey.
Within my total Great’s family on all sides, I have remaining Aunt Evelyn, Aunt Doxie, Uncle Junior, Uncle Cloyd, Aunt Mary and Aunt Mae. The wisdom of life is never to late to be learned, and as a great-nephew I am just thankful that on all sides, they have been willing to share with me.

Until then